Limits

All of us have (or we think we have) certain limits we think we cannot overcome. Fears and insecurities take over way too often and prevent us from doing what we really want to do, from following that gut feeling which tells us to bloody stop hesitating and go for what we want.

True friends accept us the way we are, while pushing us to fight our fears and silence that annoying wee voice in our head which keeps doubting: "What if it doesn't work out?" "What if I get hurt?" "What if I won't manage?" True friends look at you and tell you it's time to do it. "Don't think about it, just do it!" (Yes, it sounds like that famous commercial).

The truth is that it's sometimes hard to stop analysing and let yourself go... But a woman's got to do what a woman's got to do or it might be too late! Scary thought.

Friends are like stars...

...you don't have to see them to know they are there.

This is what it said on a wooden star I got as a present from R. today. A sentence I've heard many times before but it's interesting how things acquire a much deeper meaning if said/done by someone you really care about. Nice thought, although I am not entirely sure it holds true. Yes, you don't need to see someone all the time to consider them friends. Thank goodness, because otherwise I really couldn't say I've got that many friends :)

Today is an interesting day:

- it's the first day of autumn (at least if the weather is anything to go buy! Gah!)
- the day when a new wee creature was born :)
- the last day of little S. being 8 (can you believe she's turning 9 already?)
- my first day with a smartphone. There's nothing very special about this, if you ask me, but...get ready to be flooded with pictures of:

- food
- me cooking/baking
- me being silly
- me partying
- me going to amazing places
- me kissing guys (while taking pictures)
- me annoying my dog
- me going to concerts
- me buying new clothes (I really need some proper winter clothes, by the way)


Really? Nah! Not my thing at all!  I really hate being in the centre of attention and hate it when people know about everything I do. The occasional picture is nice, though and it might make this blog more pleasant for you to read :) By the way, have you noticed that I've put food as the first item on the list anyway? There's no "me" without food, is there?

So there you go, my wee stars. You might not always see me/hear from me (please give me some time to get used to touch screen texting!), but I'm always here!

Take a deep breath (a long one)

Part 1: A fine balance

"Don't you feel nervous today? You must be!"

My neighbour & colleague said to me on Monday, as we were driving to work. It was my first day of work after a two-and-a-half-week long holiday.

"No, not at all." I answered back. Partly because I wasn't going to tell her that every time I thought of work I got the chills and partly because I really was feeling relaxed.

Edinburgh always has an amazing effect on me. I have now decided that Scotland is a state of mind and I will do my best not to let it fade away. These past two days I have been much calmer at work (to the point that my colleagues started discussing about Edinburgh and its wonders). A colleague of mine even noticed that my shoulders were not as tense as before the holidays :) I don't know for how long this is going to last, but I somehow think that if I can recall the peace of mind that reigned over me while I was up north, nothing can go wrong.

Those of you who put up with me last year during my master's know that I can freak out really badly. But this time I won't let it happen.  I have taken T's advice seriously and I now leave work-related issues at work ("Hun, we're not paid to take them home!"). I also make sure I go rolling every day and read at least 20 pages from a nice book. I am currently reading 44 Scotland Street, which is set in Edinburgh (and it helps me preserve my state of mind). This book is to be followed by other books from the same series and A fine balance - thanks to M. for that. I also became a big fun of Bill Bryson (thanks M. and J.). I find him extremely funny! So there you go, this is my recipe for a more relaxed life. The only problem is the only way for me to relax is to go to Scotland, I might go bankrupt pretty soon! :)

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Part 2: O Petrih in Pitrih (a Slovene intermezzo)

O tem sem že dolgo nameravala pisati, a sem vedno odlašala...dokler ni bila mera polna (to se je zgodilo danes)! Tema je tako žalostno-zanimiva, da bi si zaslužila veliko daljšo objavo, ker pa sem si zaobljubila, da se ne bom obremenjevala z negativnimi čustvi, bom vsemu skupaj namenila le nekaj vrstic. Le toliko kolikor je dovolj, da povem, kako zajeban je včasih Trst.

Zakaj mora v Trstu

Peter Štrukelj postati Piter Strucheli
Klavdija Cah            Claudia Ca (beri po italijansko)
Jan Vodopivec         Gian Vodopivec (" ---")
Helena Švagelj        Elena Svagheli
Marija Krapež         Maria Crapesi???

Še dolgo bi lahko naštevala. Takih primerov je v službi neskončno. In ja, vsakič, ko slišim kako tako popačenko me zmrazi. Najprej iz ideoloških razlogov in nato tudi zato, ker me pretvarjanje iz "Cah" v "Ca" (beri: Ka) stane preveč mentalnega napora
Mama pravi, da so to dvoživke, jaz zdaj že mislim, da so to kreteni. Pa ne da se mi vse skupaj zdi čudno. Če teh ljudi starši niso naučili svojega materinega jezika in če so se oni sami sramovali lastnega porekla, potem res ni čudno, da so Petri postali Pitri. Kaj pa vem, mogoče bi bilo tudi mene sram. Ampak ne zato, ker bi moj priimek zvenel "čudno", pač pa zato, ker ne bi poznala jezika in kulture svojih staršev.
Mojega nonota so med fašizmom iz Miroslava Č. preimenovali v Emilia C. in nato še v Federica (vedno s C-jem brez strešice). Moj oče se je moral za našo strešico prebiti skozi dolga leta čakanja in cele kupe papirja.
Zato sem jaz Dana Č. Za prijatelje, znance in tudi za kolege. In to z velikim Č-jem. Res sem morala najprej vsem na dolgo in široko razlagati, zakaj je tako, ampak na koncu so le razumeli. Zanimivo je, da se je kolegica in prijateljica, ki je na pol Angležinja na pol Sicilijanka, naučila pravilno izgovorjati moj priimek veliko preden bi se tega naučili zarukani Tržačani.

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 Part 3: Addictions

I have been thinking of replacing my silly phone with a smart one...although I am not sure I really want to. The video explains it all.


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Part 4: Butterflies

He: "Have you noticed that people nowadays take pictures of everything?! You need to take pictures - and publish them on Facebook - to show people that you exist. No pictures - no life."

She: "Hmmm...does that mean that you and I don't exist?"

His smile needed no explanation. Neither did mine.

Home is where the toothbrush is

...my mum always used to say. M. took her words literally (and I mean literally the way this word should be used), so I now get a new toothbrush every time I go back.

Edinburgh never ceases to amaze me. There's something magical about it! My obsession with Scotland is probably something you all know about by now. Every time I go back, it's as if I had never left. The excitement starts kicking in way before the plane touches the ground. To be honest, it starts a couple of days before departure and quickly escalates to unbearable levels. There is no way back. You know you have been infected with what is scientifically known as the Caledonia fever if you have the following symptoms: insomnia, the urge of playing bagpipe music for at least a couple of hours a day, your accent getting stronger (and your voice lower, apparently), the need to mention Scotland/Edinburgh at least once every two sentences (the Scotch Tourette's syndrome). 

Regardless of how acute the symptoms are, it all gets better once the plane starts flying over the green pastures dotted with nice wee sheep. Your muscles relax, your breathing gets deeper and your mouth shapes into a wide smile. Once the initial state of quasi-Nirvana is over, you realise you need to hurry up and get rid of all the unnecessary clothes you were wearing and get ready to give a big hug to the welcome committee members who never fail to wait for you at the airport.

From then on it's all very exciting:

"Oh wow! The buses are so efficient and wheelchair friendly" (and "Oh no, they are 20p more expensive than last time I was here!").

"Oh, look at the grass! It's SOOOO green!"

"Oh, and the people are so friendly! They keep smiling at us!"

After stage 1 comes stage 2: the excited traveller and the welcome committee members reach their destination and while there is still room for amazement ("Oh, look at the flat! It's so tidy!), our minds  are already busy making plans for the rest of the holiday. These involve choosing at least one place where to eat every day (ranging from our favourite cafes to restaurants we have never tried and friends' homes). Once that is sorted and we have made sure that we are going to get sufficient food reserves for the next 5 months, we move on to stage 3: planning where to go and what to do (mind you, stage 2 and stage 3 very often overlap). 

I am probably one of the very few people on the planet who think that the food in Scotland is amazing. This is probably because I have friends who like eating and cooking just as much as I do. This time my top three dishes (in order of ingurgitation) were: 

- M. dad's strawberry & limoncello tiramisù

- C.'s scones for breakfast

- J's curry

- T's babaganoush 

- T.'s rhubarb and strawberry jam with plain yoghurt and cereal on top

While the highlights of the trip (excluding the culinary ones) were most certainly:

- the great weather (not one drop of rain in 7 days, would you believe that?!)

- the long talks and laughs (and the consequent sleep depravation which made everything even funnier)

- discovering new parts of Edinburgh (and going: "Aw, how come I had never seen this before!" My own answer to myself: "Because your sense of direction is as good as that of a toddler!")

- deciding to buy an island off the West coast and live there (the selling price - 3 million pounds - is just a minor detail not worth dwelling on).   

The down sides? 

NONE (if we exclude stage 4: having to leave - very early in the morning, may I add). 

The good news is that I am now well into stage 5: planning a comeback. As soon as possible.

Do women really come from Venus?

It's been a while since I last posted anything...Life is just too busy or maybe I'm just too lazy! Things have been good here, although this is my first working summer. I can really tell the difference between my life now and my life as a student. If I go out during the week I start panicking about not getting enough sleep about 11pm already and if I go out on a Friday I start yawning and wanting to go to bed at about midnight. Does this just mean I'm sleep deprived or am I getting old?

Yesterday I went out with 3 couples of friends (yes, I'm always the odd one out, the only single in a group of people!) and we had a long and heated debate about relationships and the role of women/men. To be honest I was quite shocked about all the stereotypes that came out! I mean, is it really true that guys want their girlfriend/partner to also be their mother? Is it true that they wouldn't be able to do all the housework, were they left alone for a couple of days? I think it's not. I know many couples where guys do everything, from cooking to cleaning and ironing. Although it is true that many guys are spoiled (Italian guys in particular), I think it's often (not always) women's fault if guys don't help out enough. I know many girls who want to compete with their mother in law and wouldn't let their boyfriends do anything just to show everyone how good they are. Well, my dears, if you decide to act like this, then don't complain!

Same goes for girls who tell their partner: "You'll never understand our child as well as I do, because YOU didn't carry him/her for nine months. I DID!" EXCUSE ME?! Is it the guy's fault if he cannot get pregnant?!?

And another thing: all the girls in yesterday's group were convinced that a girl and a boy cannot be just friends. One of them must always be interested in the other. One girl even said: "Because if a guy does not show any interest in a girl...well...then we should start wondering about his sexual orientation!" Really??? To me that is just like saying: "Men are all predators and they will hunt any pray, regardless of the looks and the character". Isn't that sad??? And offensive too?? I think being friends with a guy can be so relaxing and so enlightening!  Or maybe I am just lucky to have some really amazing male friends. Thank you/gracias, J&J! :)

After having spent the whole evening on the guys' side (and becoming really passionate about their "cause"), one of the guys concluded that I am a wo-man (half and half). Now I just need to find a 

man-wo, forget about all the stereotypes and enjoy life! 

The meaning of life 2

The meaning of life is getting up late, having coffee with homemade cherry jam & biscuits for breakfast, manage to send a translation you and your friend (especially you friend!) have work hard on, go running in the woods with parents + doggy (she's actually surprisingly fast!), come home for a yummy lunch and enjoy listening to all the buzzing fauna in the garden, go for a swim (the first one this year! With huuuge waves! FUN!), enjoy a nicely chilled beer while reading a book (one that I started over Easter!). And it's only 5 o'clock!

THOSE EUREKA MOMENTS...! :)

The meaning of life

?

       ?

               ?

                          ?
                                     ?

Working when on holiday surely is not an answer.